History has wild medical ideas that make modern treatments look like pure magic. Long before doctors understood germs or anesthesia, desperate patients endured some truly bizarre "cures." This list will make today's worst doctor visits seem like a walk in the park.
Mercury Consumption
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Mercury was once hailed as a miracle remedy for everything from syphilis to longevity. The ancient Chinese believed it could grant immortality. It was even used in baby teething powders well into the 20th century. But this so-called cure was far deadlier than the diseases it was meant to treat.
Trepanation (Drilling Holes in the Skull)
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Ancient healers had one solution for almost anything: drill a hole in your skull. Trepanation—one of the oldest surgical procedures—was meant to release evil spirits, relieve pressure, or balance the body's "humors." Archaeologists have found skulls from thousands of years ago with precise, healed holes, meaning some patients survived. Others weren't so lucky.
Urine Therapy
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If you've ever complained about bad-tasting medicine, be grateful you weren't around when people drank their urine for "health benefits." Urine therapy was believed to cleanse the body and cure ailments ranging from acne to cancer. The ancient Romans and Egyptians swore by it, and even in the 20th century, some alternative medicine circles kept the tradition alive.
Dead Mouse Poultices
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Toothaches were no joke in ancient times, and without painkillers, people got creative. Ancient Egyptians mashed up dead mice and applied the paste to their gums, believing it would ease the pain. In medieval England, they skipped the paste and shoved an entire dead mouse into the mouth. Some even rubbed rodent corpses on warts as a cure.
Corpse Medicine
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For centuries, European doctors prescribed crushed bones, human blood, and even ground-up mummies as medicine. This practice was based on the belief that consuming the body parts of the dead transferred their vitality to the living. Powdered skulls were used for epilepsy, while fresh blood was sometimes drunk straight from executed criminals.
Electric Shock Therapy
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Electricity has been a medical treatment for centuries, but early attempts were more experimental than scientific. In the 18th and 19th centuries, doctors zapped patients for conditions ranging from paralysis to impotence. Some used electric fish to administer shocks, while later devices promised to restore energy and improve mood.
Animal Dung Ointments
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Ancient Egyptian medicine was surprisingly advanced, but not every idea was a winner. Healers treated infections and injuries by slathering them with crocodile, sheep, or donkey dung. The belief was that these substances had healing properties. Given the high risk of sepsis, this was more of a fast track to infection than a cure.
Eating Clay & Dirt
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Eating dirt may sound like something only a toddler would do, but historically, it was an actual medical practice. Ancient civilizations believed clay had detoxifying properties and could help with stomach issues. And while certain types of clay can bind to toxins, overeating can lead to blockages, malnutrition, and even poisoning.
Amputation
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The solution to almost every wound used to be to cut it off. During the Civil War and earlier, surgeons routinely amputated limbs at the first sign of infection. The process was crude—no anesthesia, just a saw, some whiskey, and brute force. Many patients died from shock or blood loss.
Snail Slime for Sore Throats
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A scratchy throat? Some ancient Greek doctors recommended swallowing snail slime. They believed the mucus had soothing properties and could heal ulcers and inflammation. While gulping down snail goo is repulsive, modern skincare uses snail mucin for its hydrating effects.
Boiled Puppies for Epilepsy
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Epilepsy was misunderstood, and treatments were often extreme. One of the most disturbing involved boiling a puppy and drinking the broth in an attempt to transfer the illness to the dog. It didn't, of course—it just resulted in unnecessary cruelty. Other remedies included drinking the blood of a beheaded man or wearing a dead animal's heart around the neck.
Eating Ground-Up Gems
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Royalty in the Middle Ages and Renaissance sometimes consumed powdered gems. They believed crushed diamonds, rubies, and pearls had healing properties. These "remedies" were thought to treat plague, poison, and aging. The problem is that many gems contain toxic elements, and swallowing sharp mineral fragments could tear up the digestive tract.
Vinegar & Sulfur Baths
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People desperately tried to avoid infection during the Black Death. One standard method was bathing in vinegar, sulfur, or urine, hoping to "purify" the body. Some even sat in smoke-filled rooms to "ward off" the disease. Unfortunately, these efforts did little to stop the plague, which killed millions.
Drinking Lead-Infused Wine
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Ancient Romans had a dangerous habit—sweetening their wine with lead. They loved the taste and had no idea it was poisoning them. Over time, lead consumption caused neurological problems, infertility, and madness. Some historians believe widespread lead poisoning played a role in Rome's decline.
Dog Licks for Healing Wounds
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Some cultures believed dog saliva had healing powers, so they let dogs lick their wounds. It's true that dog saliva contains some antimicrobial properties, but it also carries bacteria that can lead to infections. Letting a dog clean a wound isn't exactly sterile—modern medicine does it much better.
